Apparently I’m famous. I recently spent two weeks in the mountains of Colorado and almost 200 people came to see me.
It all went down under the pretense of something called Kamp Koinonia. I’m pretty sure “koinonia” is the Greek word for “chubby little baby.”
Shortly after I arrived, my family and I set up registration in order to organize everyone to make sure they would have the opportunity to spend time with me.
Every day was extremely fun. We did all kinds of things together. In the mornings, we did calisthenics. This involved everyone doing ridiculous exercises. I was Daddy’s free-weight.
Nearby is a merry-go-round. It is very old and very dangerous. I heard it has a tendency to fling its passengers off with the same enthusiasm as a propeller—that over the years, it has provided a lot of laughs, but also a lot of stitches. We fondly referred to it as the Scary-Go-Down. Mommy let Daddy sit with me on it, but at low speed.
We stayed in a room that had its own bathroom and its own gigantic spider. Mommy seemed to be equally excited about both.
Since we were up in the mountains, however, it was necessary for me to take a bath in a giant Tupperware container. It was fun.
We did a lot of walking. Or rather, my Mommy and Daddy did a lot of walking. I just let them carry me. But sometimes we got to ride in a golf cart. It was pretty exciting. As we traveled the length of the campground, everyone would call out my name. I would smile and wave like any decent celebrity would do.
Sometimes, the people would play this game called “Reaping Time” where they would have to face fun punishments given to them during “Court.” A handful of boys were brought up on charges for calling me cute. They were sentenced to come up with a word for each letter of my name. They said I is for Innocent. P is for Perfect in every way. P is for Puny and cute. I is for Interesting. I’ll allow that.
I myself was summoned to appear before the court. Again, for being cute. What can I say? When the judge asked if I had anything to say in my defense, I offered a little baby babble. It seemed to do the trick. I was released into the custody of my Mommy.
At one point, there was a war. It was fought with flour bombs. After the war was over, Daddy came over to say hi and I threw a flour bomb at him. I made sure my hand was in my Mommy’s hand so it would look like it was her idea.
Believe it or not, despite all the noise of the all the activities, once in a while, I was able to get some sleep.
There was a talent show. I demonstrated my yoga skills. I let Mommy, Aunt Julie, and Aunt Cherie (Rachel) help.
It was great being with my family. It was also great being with my many fans. They were so friendly and made me very happy.
It’s good to be home now. But it is difficult to not be surrounded by the adoring crowds anymore. Such is fame.