Born Yesterday

I don’t want to give the impression that I’m going to post something every day, but I also didn’t want to miss this opportunity.

From what I understand there is a term people use when they want to imply a person is being dumb. They ask the person, “Were you born yesterday?”

I take offense to this.

I was born yesterday and frankly I’m not anywhere near dumb. During the past twenty-four hours, I have mentally adjusted from living underwater to living in the open air. I have started memorizing a custom-made lexicon of sounds so that I can eventually translate a completely unfamiliar language. I have altered the schedules of enough people to fill a small town.

What about you? What have you done the past twenty-four hours?

That’s what I thought.