Sunday, November 22, 2015

One Week and Only Two Complaints

Before I give some critical input about my experiences so far, I would first like to point out that in general—things are great.

Even though there’s snow on the ground, Mommy and Daddy have made sure I am quite toasty. Our house has lots of windows, so I get to doze in the sunshine more than you would expect for this time of the year. Countless family and friends have given me enough clothes to last until I get my driver’s license. Unfortunately I’m also being fed very well and that means that by the time I’m gawking at Christmas lights, most of them won’t fit any more.

There’s no denying it. I have it pretty good. I sleep a lot and cry a little, but don’t mistake these for boredom or despair. I’m actually having a really good time. I’m pretty sure that these things with fingers and toes belong to me and I’m already considering the possibilities.

However, I do have two complaints.

First—How would you like it if someone yanked you out of your sleep, stripped you down, applied freezing Wet Wipes all over your body, put your clothes back on, and then deposited you back in bed? It’s hard to believe any of the lullabies. Sweet dreams indeed.

Second—Every time I start to make the slightest complaint, someone grabs me and sways me back and forth until I’m unconscious. By the time I wake up again, I can’t remember what I was going to say.

So while I’ve got this moment of clarity, let me just close by…ZZZZZZZ